Twas the night before Christmas in the center of town -- a little Jew-Princess was donning her gown. To go to the Jew ball and meet many princes, and perhaps even eat lots of latkes and blintzes.
She zipped up her black dress -- a size 2 don't you know. Just part of the effort to attract a nice beau. She packed up her Vuitton and prayed for good luck, and hoped that she wouldn't get stuck with a schmuck.
For schmucks come in bucketloads, shitloads, and bunches. When they take out a Princess, they don't pay for lunches (oye vey). This Princess had known enough schmucks in her time; to not have to meet others would just be sublime.
So out of the door she bounced with a clatter, and thought, "in this size 2 dress I must not get fatter." She clip-clopped her heels along the cold pavement and imagined Jew-Santa would bring her a Jew-gent.
She arrived at the venue and saw lots of Jews, and wondered how long the line was to get in the loos. "I just need to pee-pee and have a cocktail in hand, then I just know that this night shall be grand!"
The little Jew-Princess worked that little black dress (well, what do you expect, she was dressed to impress). She smiled and she thought as she danced with delight, "Merry Matzoh Ball to all, and to all a great night, I may just be lucky and meet Mr. Right!"
copyright (c) 2010-2011 Celia Mei Rubin
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