Preaching the Shit out of Love

This is not going to be well written; it's almost midnight and I'm a tad hormonal. I just don't understand how it's the year 2013 and America is still discussing whether or not same-sex marriage is kosher (it's Passover, I had to). I don't know the facts and I don't know anything about politics, and I DO NOT UNDERSTAND. Correct me if I'm wrong: the Declaration of Independence states, "All men are created equal." "Equal" means...well...equal...right? And I just googled the Constitution on Wikipedia and it states that by putting the constitution in place, the American people are to be provided (a) justice, (b) civil peace, (c) common defense, (d) those things of a general welfare that they could not provide themselves, and (e) freedom. A government of "liberty and union, now and forever." "Liberty and union, now and forever" means...well...liberty and union, now and forever, right? RIGHT? Why is America not practicing what it so clearly preaches? WHY?? It's right there, in black and white, no? Am I missing something? Tell me if I am because it's driving me insane (you don't believe me? I'm up writing a blog entry after midnight on a school night). Unless I'm mistaken, taking away someone's right to marry means taking away the same choices that the majority of Americans are allowed to make, which means that there is a lack of that "equal" and "liberty" stuff, which means it goes against the American constitution, so...why the fuck is our government still discussing it?!

You know what really bugs me? These Justices (is that what the're called?) are, I'm assuming, some of the most educated people in America. Why aren't they all like, "why the fuck are we discussing this?" Because I'm definitely not more learned than they, and if I were a Justice and was asked to make a decision about same-sex marriage, I'd be like, "why the fuck are we discussing this they are American human beings which makes them exactly the same as every other American human being so of course they should fucking be allowed to get married I can't believe I had to get out of bed at 5am for this shit just fucking let them live like everyone else and do it now so that I can get the fuck out of this stuffy room and go have a cup of tea." These Justices are supposed to be setting an example for the rest of the country, not faffing about over basic human rights.

I don't even know what the arguments against same-sex marriage are. Is it because it's un-constitutional? Because that idea is just wrong and shouldn't be up for debate. "We the people" includes every single American that walks the Earth. "We the people" is colorblind, class-blind, sex-blind, and so why should it be anything but sexual preference blind, as well?  Is it because it goes against what the bible says is right? So what? So does gluttony, and I practice that daily and no one is debating over my right to be glutinous. And the very notion of freedom declares that we have a right to choose to believe in God and the Bible or not, so how dare anyone have the right to infringe legally on others' beliefs or non-beliefs. Is it because it is a bad example for kids? I mean...do I need to write down examples of kids born into marriages of a mother and father who ended up severely fucked up and/or caused mass destruction and/or committed mass murders? Just as growing up with one mother and one father does not guarantee the healthy mind of a child, growing up with two fathers or two mothers does not guarantee the unhealthy mind of a child. Is it because, if your neighbours happen to be a same-sex couple and they get married, they will cause your family unhappiness? That's bullshit. Junior high "she has braces so we can't let her sit at our lunch table or she'll make us all unpopular" kind of bullshit. First of all, happiness is a choice that comes from within. If you're unhappy, you should work on not being unhappy instead of wasting time judging other people. Second of all, I'm pretty certain that that same-sex couple who just got married down the road are far too obsessed with each other to give a shit about you and your family.

The idea that not everyone in the United States of America in the year 2013 does not have the right to marry the person of their choosing is preposterous and I am ashamed on behalf of the people of this country who do not view it as so. This is not an argument about the bible or who makes who feel uncomfortable or who is gay, straight, into black men, or into Asian chicks. It's about whether the American people agree that every single American has the right to make the same choices as everyone else, regardless of sexual preference. Why are we even discussing this? Why am I writing a blog about it? Because I believe in love and choice and freedom for ALL and showing those kids that I work with on a daily basis that the most important things in any relationship, friendship or otherwise, are love, kindness and mutual respect. With all those things, how can there be anything but happiness? I feel lucky to be the sort of person whose FB feed turned red today. History does change. History is changing. I wish for the generations that come after us to look upon ours and see that we chose unconditional love for each other and in the way we raised our children. So let's fucking make it happen so that I can stop swearing.

Aloud, Proud, and Unapologetic

It is 24 hours after New York became the 6th state in the USA to legalise gay marriage. Having sobbed for half an hour upon hearing the announcement, I am still overwhelmed. I don''t know anything about politics. I can't hold a conversation about legalities (though, being a lawyer's daughter, I'm getting good at faking it). I don't know the names of the various politicians whose names I should be familiar with. What I do know is that I believe with all ferocity that every single human being who walks this Earth deserves the same rights as anyone else. We are all created equal. We all ARE equal. This is not a discussion; this is fact. That there are still women in various countries who are not allowed to vote blows my mind. That child labor still exists in parts of the world is inconceivable. That in modern day western culture, when the collective fancies ourselves as smarter and wiser than ever, there are now only 6 states in the USA, the self-proclaimed land of the free, where same-sex marriage is deemed legal, is absurdity. But, let's not focus on the negative. There is too much good to be recognised.

One of the most moving things about the journey towards the passage of the bill is that I saw so many straight people fighting on behalf of our gay and lesbian brothers and sisters. People who do not have much, if anything, to gain personally from the legalisation of same-sex marriage fought with solid integrity. Letters were written, donations were made, charity events were held. These people, with wills the strength of an ox, put me to such shame as I sat and merely watched. To stand up and yell at the top of your lungs for a cause that directly affects you is noble. To be just as bold and loud when it is someone else's cause is remarkably beautiful. Thank you to those who reaffirmed that togetherness is much harder to turn a deaf ear to than a solo voice.

What a time to be living in New York.

The day after Osama Bin Laden was reported dead, I was at Ground Zero, taking pictures of all the placards and news crews. A couple of young people, opposed to the killing of Bin Laden, were quietly making their opinions seen by holding up signs. On one sign was written, "an eye for an eye only leads to blindness." Next to the young man holding this sign were newspaper clippings someone else had taped onto the wall. These were of tabloids which had shamelessly glamorised the story. An ironic sight to behold, and yet, a reminder that I live in a culture where we are privileged with the freedom of speech. Thank goodness that we are all entitled to speak our opinions and our beliefs. However, to force our opinions and beliefs onto others is unfair. Seeing some of the negative response to last night's news was disheartening. But, not enough to dampen the joy! So, up yours, ye hypocrites of skewed faith who stand idly by while someone of your brotherhood molests young boys, yet, in response to the right of same-sex couples to make their love legally binding, proclaim: "The Bishops of New York State oppose in the strongest possible terms any attempt to redefine the sacred institution of marriage. Marriage has always been, is now, and always will be the union of one man and one woman. Government does not have the authority to change this most basic of truths." I curse ye, everyone part of the New York State Catholic Conference, to rot in your own smelly hypocrisy!

Today, the day after same-sex marrige was legalised in New York, and also, appropriately so, the day before gay pride day, I walked through the West Village. There, as one would expect, the pride was palpable. I saw a gay couple both wearing shirts that said "Trophy Husband," and had to turn away before the tears came streaming down. I wonder how many proposals will happen tomorrow during Pride? One more massive step towards equality, and for those whom the passing of the bill most directly affects, I imagine that celebrations will be unrivaled.

"Today marks another step in history's uneven but resolute march to justice." (Dan Cantor, Working Families Party) Every step taken is born from the efforts of many generations of activists. Whomever you all are, and wherever you all are, I thank you for fighting to make this world a better place. Love won this time. Let's hope it keeps on winning, for the millions who still need it. We're one step closer to freedom and justice for all.